How about a nice poke in the eye?

Remember the dueling banjos?



Today we have the Dueling Hegelian Dialectic. We have a real problem (fiat currency), and we need a real reaction, and a real solution. But in parallel, we have a manufactured problem with a timing issue (the bailouts), and a manufactured reaction (provoking people to riot at the appointed scapegoats), and a manufactured solution (Martial Law, new currency, etc.)

Apparently, in about eight weeks, all hell is going to break loose with the real problem: hyperinflation.

But for our overlords, everything has not quite been put into place to manage the problem of our fiat money system imploding, and that's why you have some messy problems like Bernie Madoff having to fall on his sword, and Hank Paulson looking all squirrely in public, and this unfortunate leadership vacuum between the merciful end of GWBush and the beginning of Obama. I really think this was all meant to hang together for just a few more months. It would have been much easier to manage -- for scapegoating purposes -- if Obama got in there before it all came unglued. It would have been nice and neat. The Republican bastards would take the blame, but they would be already gone so it wouldn't matter. But as it stands now, scapegoats are desperately needed in real time, and nobody has left the stage yet. Can we get a volunteer to be the bad guy so we can make our escape? C'mon....somebody?...Bernie?? Super. We love you, baby. Anyone else? We need a few more. We have several trillion dollars of shit to cover up, people. No joke. Come on...who's a team player?

So our overlords are focused on that timing issue. They have got to get everybody wrapped up in some big chocolate mess before the eight weeks are up, because when the problem of hyperinflation hits, there will be no more Mr. Nice Goys in America. And our overlords will have no place to hide. Therefore, somebody has got to be the scapegoat right now, and the bankers drew the short straw. Which is sort of fair, but not totally, as they did not do this all by themselves. They did it with the help of the corporate media and Congress, among others. But hey, those guys are not the designated scapegoats this time. No no no. Somebody has to direct the show.

Enter the REACTION PORTAL. You are getting very sleepy. Veeerrry sleeeepy. Now listen to me. It is time for you to outraged at bankers. Point all your rage at the bankers. Good. Soon you will riot in the streets, just like they did in Greece. Yessss. Veeerry goood. Listen to CNN. Listen to your Congresspeople. Yessss. They have your best interests at heart always. Always. Please riot so we can institute Martial Law. Yesss. We need you to be very upset and distracted now. Yessss. With bankers. Not with us. No No. Listen to us. Just be angry with the bankers. That's right. Goood.



Well, Peasant, shouldn't we be outraged at bankers? Oh yes. Most definitely. But hey, didn't our Congresspeople totally neglect to put strings into the legislation after the American people made it crystal clear that we didn't want any bailout in the first place? WHY is any of this a surprise?? It was very clear from the beginning that Congress had no intention of doing a thing to protect the taxpayers.

These assholes have supposedly worked it all out. So they say. (Does Henry Paulson look like a bloodsucking ghoul all the time?)

Behold the cornucopia of hedging language to describe this deal.

The plan calls for the Treasury Department to buy deeply distressed mortgage-backed securities and other bad debts held by banks and other investors. The money should help [or not help] troubled lenders make new loans and keep credit lines open. The government would later try [they will try, but they will fail] to sell the discounted loan packages at the best possible price.

At the insistence of House Republicans, some [unspecified amount] of the program's $700 billion would be devoted to a program that would encourage [as opposed to require] holders of distressed mortgage-backed securities to keep them and buy government insurance to cover defaults.

The legislation would place "reasonable" limits [as determined by the ultra-rich] on severance packages for executives of companies that benefit from the rescue plan, said a senior administration official who was authorized to speak only on background. It would affect fired executives of financial firms, and executives of firms that go bankrupt. Some [unspecified] of the provisions would be retroactive and some [unspecified] prospective, the official said.

And so forth. I don't even think it's necessary to speculate about the bribes paid into Caymen Island bank accounts that made this legislation possible.

And CNN. Let's talk about that little shop for a second. CNN, which lost the feed during a truthy rant. CNN, which neglected to report on the bailout protests. CNN, which played a role covering up events in Georgia (read the comments).

So what I'm trying to say is this: people really should cock an eyebrow at CNN's (or any other) breathless reports about how outraged you should be that the bankers screwed us. You already know that it's outrageous, don't you? Do you really need CNN to tell you that the bankers have destroyed the world economy? Wouldn't it have been much more helpful if CNN had done some fierce investigative reporting...you know...earlier?

And the same for Congress. Spare us the grave concern, you shameless people who have just given yourselves a raise over our dead bodies. I've never known a bunch of lawyers to make the lamest contracts possible for their clients, unless of course they pretend to work for the American people but in reality have been bought and paid for multiple times over by special interests.

All these people should just save their breath. And Americans should tuck their rage in for about eight more weeks and refuse to be baited and lured into some media-led reaction that is sure to make a nice getaway opportunity for the guilty parties. Just hold on for a while longer. Don't react to their little timing problems while they scurry off to count their money stashed away in offshore banks. When it's time to react, you will know. You don't need CNNABCCBSMSNBCFOX to tell you when your money becomes worthless. That's when it all stops. That's when everybody will turn their eyes together on the enemy within. I hope they shit their pants for a change.