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Get ready for the War on Birds and Other Wildlife Creatures

Seriously. I'm feeling cynical this morning, but if you have ever suspected that the corporate media uses language to manipulate you, um, yes it is confirmed. These fucking birds. Either they're gonna kill you with their damn germs or they will strike your plane and take it out while you're on the way to the Bahamas for a well-deserved vacation. Listen, you might also want to watch out for pigs. Talk about dangerous...,0,3409115.story
Airplane 'bird strikes' have climbed dramatically, FAA records show

Wildlife strikes involve creatures -- including foxes and lizards -- hitting windshields, wings and stabilizers. [Wildlife strikes = creatures hitting your airplanes people, and they do it on purpose. Don't think they're all cuddly and innocent no fucking way these suckers are vicious.] New York's JFK airport tops the list. [Naturally! they are brilliantly evil, diabolically smart, of course they will go for the jugular, NYC. Duh.] Carriers don't have to report strikes. [Yeah that's another thing, we definitely need to be collecting more information fer God's sake someone could get hurt.]

Aircraft at Los Angeles International Airport struck birds or other animals in 940 instances from 1990 through 2008, according to data released Friday by the Federal Aviation Administration.

The strikes involved gulls, hawks, pigeons and other creatures hitting windshields, wings and stabilizer areas. Only 36 of the incidents, or 3.8%, resulted in substantial damage, records show. There were no fatalities. At least five times, planes reported hitting foxes.

The records are part of a newly available database that lists 112,387 reports of aircraft striking wildlife, [Are you sure it shouldn't say WILDLIFE STRIKING AIRCRAFT? HMMM??? You know, put the subject and the verb in the most compelling order please.] including reptiles and mammals, at 2,008 airports in the United States and Canada from January 1990 through November 2008.

The records show that the number of wildlife strikes has increased dramatically nationwide in the last decade. [Do these wildlife organizations work for AQ?] Since 2000, the list of airports with the greatest number of serious incidents is led by New York's John F. Kennedy International, with 30 strikes, and Sacramento International, with 28. LAX, with 16, is tied for ninth place. [Is this a competition to see which airport is the biggest victim of terrorist wildlife strikes?]

Public focus on bird strikes heightened after a US Airways jet made a harrowing landing in the Hudson River in January. The pilot of the Airbus A320 reported a "double bird strike" during takeoff and lost power in both engines, making an emergency water landing.

The database represents the most complete public view yet of the problem, but drawing comparisons or attempting to analyze trends is difficult because the FAA doesn't require airports or airline carriers to report bird strikes. Moreover, key fields in the database, such as damage incurred and where the strike happened, are incomplete. [So you see, there is a lackadaisical approach to this wildlife terrorism problem, and the government does not repeat DOES NOT collect enough information. More information needs to be collected to Keep You Safe.]

For example, out of 1,258 reports of substantial damage since 2000, there was no airport listed for 202 of the incidents, or 16%.

"I would caution against comparing one airport's numbers to another airport's numbers, because reporting is voluntary," said Los Angeles FAA spokesman Ian Gregor. "An airport that is very diligent in reporting these bird strikes could appear to have more incidents simply because they do a better job of reporting."

Long Beach Airport logged 148 incidents during the 18-year period, and John Wayne Airport in Orange Country reported 214, according to the data. Bob Hope Airport in Burbank listed 218 incidents.

Despite the data's limitations, experts said the information would help researchers understand the dimensions of the problem and develop ways to improve safety at a time when areas around many airports have seen a resurgence in bird populations.

"It will create a safer environment in the long run," said Richard Dolbeer, a biologist and former chairman of the Bird Strike Committee, a group of airline industry and wildlife management experts.

The group said that more than 219 people have been killed worldwide because of wildlife strikes since 1988, and that damage has exceeded $6 million a year in the U.S. alone.

One function of the FAA database, Dolbeer said, would be to examine airports with strikes that involved substantial damage.

Experts said airports with the biggest bird problems are generally near waterways or agricultural areas.

"The birds are definitely on the rise," said Jon Russell, Western Pacific safety coordinator for the Airline Pilots Assn. "Birds come to eat, nest and loaf near airports." [Ha they loaf around. Figures. No good lazy terrorist birds breeding uncontrollably like welfare queens.]

Gregor noted that strikes are very rare, given that there are 60 million aircraft operations a year at airports with FAA control towers. [But shit don't let that stop you from forming a committee and getting the public all hopped up on the fear of wildlife strikes against jumbo jets.]

In a letter sent Tuesday to federal transportation officials, National Transportation Safety Board Acting Chairman Mark V. Rosenker noted that his agency has recommended since 1999 that the FAA make it mandatory for airplane operators to report bird strikes.

The FAA said it plans to work with the airline community to strengthen reporting.

Initially, the FAA proposed to keep portions of the database confidential. Allowing public access, the agency said, might discourage some carriers and airports from reporting incidents.

But some members of Congress and the National Transportation Safety Board criticized the proposal, saying that releasing the information is in the public interest. [Yes it helps with the perception management psyops operation.]


Sis said…
Since a birds life is cut short in mid-flight when hit by an airplane, I propose a $250,000 fine per kill, enforced by the National Wildlife Association, with proceeds going toward proper burial and the remainder to construct nesting habitats away from the dangers of human ingenuity. Perhaps a bird memorial could be constructed and the names of each aviacaust victim displayed for us to never forget our fine feathered friends.

Nest in Peace.
A. Peasant said…
aren't you supposed to be on a beach somewhere?
Sis said…
I was enjoying the surf until I grew afraid of the seagulls flying dangerously close to my young. I got them safely into the van, applied anti-bacterial lotion and put on gas masks.